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The Loser's Song
by: Ed Hill

Ever wonder why people tell those awful bad beat stories that we all have to listen to? Losers need to tell bad beat stories, winners on occasion tell them also, but it mainly the job of the losing players.

When you take into account the effect of the winning players and the rake; you have a high percentage of losing players. These people know they are losers and they also know that you know they are losers. What is going on when a loser is telling a successful player a bad beat story is; You see, I would be a winning player just like you if it wasn’t for all this hard luck that follows me around. Listen to this one if you don’t think that I am the unluckiest thing that ever walked the face of the Earth. There is a need to convince other people that they are a winning player. But the problem is they know we know they are not winning players. You know what comes immediately after somebody starts telling their tale of woe, the BITE!

I am so unlucky, listen to this one, and this one, and then there was this one. You see I would be a winner just like you except for the fact that I am so unlucky. Do you think you could loan me a $1,000 or stake me in this game? They are singing the “Loser’s Song.”

You must realize that when you loan a loser money that in all likelihood you are NEVER going to see that money again. How in the world is a loser ever going to turn things around good enough to pay his bills and be able to afford to pay you back? It isn’t going to happen. The higher you play the bigger the bite. You have probably made friends with this person, the minute you loan him money that will be the end of the friendship. This person will now start avoiding you because he doesn’t want you nagging him about paying you back. Or he doesn’t want to have to look you in the eyes it makes him feel bad about himself. Either way, you are going to be out the money you loaned him.

Over the last 20 years when somebody starts singing the “Loser’s Song” to me, I tell them right away, “ I don’t loan money.” They immediately get irritated “I wasn’t going to ask you for money.” Then they leave. Two real good things happened here.

   1. I didn’t have to listen to the Loser’s Song.
   2. I didn’t loan them any money.

Then there are groups of losers that congregate to form a chorus and sing the “Loser’s Song” together. They sit around all day and tell each other all the horrible things that have happened to them. They are a bunch of sad people that are all addicted gamblers and the old saying “misery loves company” applies to the whole group.

It would be too much hard work to actually study all the material that is available and really work on their game and improve. It is easier to sit around and whine about how unlucky they are. Which reminds me; What’s the difference between a dog and a poker player? In ten years or so the dog quits whining!

Singing the “Loser’s Song” is bad for your game. It creates negative energy and I want positive energy around me. Bad beats happen to good players, they are part of the game. When you have somebody set over set and there is one card to come you do not own the whole pot, you own 43/44 of the pot. The guy that has the under set owns 1/44 of the pot. The dealer is now going to turn over one card and one of us is going to get the entire pot. Every time you win this pot you are thinking to yourself, “I had the best hand and I was supposed to win the pot.” The one time in 44 that you actually lose, you are running around telling everybody the nightmare that just happened to you. You have to consider that the 43 times out of 44 you won in this situation you won a little more money than you actually had coming and this extra money is to be used to pay for the one time that you didn’t win. Say the pot is $880. If we were to divide the pot right now and not turn over the last card:

The top set would get (880) (43/44) = $860
The under set would get (880) (1/44) = $20

Therefore each time you actually win this pot you are making $20 that you didn’t have coming, it belonged to the other guy. Rather than divide the pot we are going to turn over one more card and the winner is going to get the entire pot.

So listen to this one, you won’t believe it. Really you are not going to believe it. Sometime in the late 70’s I was playing $10-$20 at the Golden Nugget. The dealer is dealing and exposes a King, which becomes the burn card. Capped before the flop and it is AA vs. KK. The flop comes A-K-4 rainbow therefore the Kings are drawing dead. The pot is now heads up and the set of Aces can not possibly lose.
The cocktail waitress was standing behind the dealer with a tray of drinks, somebody at the table behind her scooted back in their chair and banged her. She lost control of the tray and actually hit the dealer in the back of the head, he dropped the deck and the tray hit the middle of the table. We all got drenched! Now the entire deck is sitting in the middle of the table. Now the deck gets reshuffled and the dealer burns and turns. You guessed it, the river was a King! Now this guy has a bad beat story that is actually worth listening to!

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